Wednesday, 25 December 2013

The 10 Commandments redifined

Well, its Christmas eve and I am working in this Godly hour (not really). Just chanced upon to flip through the 10 Commandments of The Holy Bible, and my otherwise idle brain wisecracked.


The 10 commandments are a staple of Catholicism and have been around for thousands of years. And as we know, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Here is an updated set of commandments for the new era (With all due respect):

1. Thou shalt not kill--unless you were brought onto the show Comedy Nights with Kapil.
2. Thou shalt not commit adultery--What is the opposite of adultery? Childery?? Maybe adultery isn’t so bad then.
3. Thou shalt not use the Lord’s name in vain–unless you are the victim of anger attack. Lack of swearing might make you less cooler.
4. Honor and obey your parents–unless they hack your facebook and whatsapp.
5. Thou shalt not steal - You can always beat someone up for their iphone, and hack their computer among other things.
6. Thou shalt not covet--thy neighbor’s wife–she is probably friends with your mom.
7. Thou shalt have no other Gods before me–except maybe Godzilla–He doesnt look like the God fearing type.
8. Thou shalt keep the sabbath holy–at least until 12pm when the liquor stores open
9. Thou shalt have no idols–except the Indian idol. They are anyways idle.
10.Thou shalt not bear false witness–only spread true gossip

Follow these simple rules and you will thank me in Heaven.

For those who are yet to discover the Ten Commanments,
Click here (Thou shalt do as I say): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Ten_Commandments



3 comments:

  1. "-What is the opposite of adultery? Childery?? Maybe adultery isn’t so bad then" hahaha... LOL...what an imagination. Thy shalt bow before Arti's power of imagination.

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    Replies
    1. LOL....this is the offshoot of the super idle mind :P

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